the vfa blog


crazy gideon

May 29, 2009 11:41 AM



Gideon may be crazy, but he knows what brings in the customers. Everyone loves a kooky accent.

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tax preparation joy

May 28, 2009 4:04 PM



A new baby may mean another deduction, but it'll also mean more noise while Dad's trying to do the taxes next year. Better get to H&R Block.

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rubberduckzilla

May 27, 2009 3:53 PM



Why bother with water when you can live on a sugary, sweetened fruit drink? So what if your dehydration makes you hallucinate giant inflatable animals?

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the golden gift

May 26, 2009 11:36 AM



The giant man is cruel, but it's probably all for the best. We once knew a family that subsisted on nothing but McDonald's for a full year. It did not end well.

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fling chocolate

May 22, 2009 12:21 PM



If the chocolate bar is so guilt-free—only 85 calories!—then how come the girl has to go in a dressing room to eat it?

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super dope homeboy from the Oak Town

May 21, 2009 11:51 AM

Furniture stores come up with the best songs. I mean, the guys at Oak Furniture Warehouse wrote this, right? It should be on the radio, for real.

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get a perm

May 19, 2009 5:55 PM



When an imaginary mariachi man tells you the seize the moment, always listen.

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baby pan pan

May 18, 2009 5:50 PM



Sadly, after 207 takes of having pizza snatched away from them, both of these tiny tykes grew up with serious anger issues. Recently, little Lucy was jailed after throwing a chair through a window when someone told her there was no pepperoni left.

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the hawaii chair

May 14, 2009 4:02 PM



Watch as the pounds virtually fall off! Then, cover your eyes as your boss fires you because you were hula-ing too hard to get any work done.

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colgate blue minty gel

May 13, 2009 1:52 PM



We're a little concerned about the fact that these kids can't stop eating the blue minty gel. It may be that this whole music video (based on the 1980 Madness hit, "Baggy Trousers") is an elaborate fluoride trip.

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the boneless belt

May 12, 2009 3:14 PM



The boneless belt splits your fat in "easily manageable blobs" to increase blood flow and, in turn, burn more calories. And, as an added bonus, you'll look like you have giant bubble wrap underneath your shirt, and you'll get to deal with people coming by and trying to pop you. It's win-win!

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nicolas cage's favorite things

May 11, 2009 10:37 AM

Following our theme of celebrities padding their wallets with overseas advertising, here's Nicolas Cage for Pachinko:



We have to assume that Pachinko is well-known enough in Japan to have commercials this ambiguous. Based on Cage's other favorite things, we thought Pachinko was ... a type of bubble bath? Raspberry jelly? The Japanese translation of "Face/Off"? Come to think of it, those are our favorite things, too.

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nicole kidman loves schweppes

May 8, 2009 3:02 PM



We're really not sure what to say about this strange ad, so how about some Nicole Kidman trivia instead? Here it is: She's allergic to strawberries. Don't worry — Schweppes Agrum is made with grapefruit, tangerine and orange. The heroine of this bizarre fairy tale is safe.

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hands off the ovaltine

May 7, 2009 9:00 AM



Be warned, kids. You drink copious amounts of Ovaltine, and your parents will leave you forever. It'll be a pretty sad holiday season for you. Stay away from that chocolatey goodness.

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kinder surprise

May 5, 2009 5:03 PM



Hey, quit laughing. There's nothing funny about crippling speech impediments. Especially the kind that drive a man to throw himself off a wall. Have you no heart?

If you're really curious, check out this video for one fan's interpretation of the Kinder Man's unique vernacular.

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goma-mugi cha

May 4, 2009 5:20 PM



When beating a fire with giant tree branches is unsuccessful, just try puncturing your skull. Works every time.

You know we're kidding, right? We in no way endorse skull puncturing of any kind. Seriously.

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say it sexy, scott

May 1, 2009 5:03 PM



Now, wait a minute. Is this commercial supposed to make us want a tasty-toasty sub, or some tasty oven booty? Because, well, we're embarrassed, but we're kind of craving the latter.

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